Monday, May 09, 2005

Soap Bubbles, Rock Hard French Fries and Crayons...

Saturday I mentioned to my husband what I wanted for Mother's Day...for someone (other than me) to wash and mainly vacuum my car. Anyone who has ever transported a toddler for any length of time will understand. The back of my car was covered in a inch of ground up crackers, stray cereal, wayward goldfish and rock hard french fries. My husband was relieved. His comment "Really? That's all you want? Cool because that beats the hell out of wandering around Wal-Mart trying to decide what to get you." Such a romantic man! (This is the same man that gave me an Anniversary card unsigned...yes unsigned! But at least he remembered!)

So during the afternoon, he washed my car with Jed's help. Well I'm not sure how much help Jed was but he had a ball. By the end of it, he was wandering around soaked from head to toe, stomping in puddles and grinning ear to ear. Later in the evening, Shelby helped him vacuum. Her job was to keep feeding quarters into the machine.

That night that sent Jed to give me a Mother's Day card. They let him scribble his name but apparently he was not done because when the took the pen away he fussed. So he brought me the card grudgingly. After reading it, he said he wanted to draw more so I found him a green crayon and handed him back the card. Shelby was mortified that he was ruining my card. I told her he was still working on it and if she wanted her card back to color all over it, I would let her too. I cherish that scribbled card as much as the message that Shelby wrote in hers.

Shelby has been in my life since she was 6 years old. One night, three years ago (about a week before my wedding) Shelby's mom's situation hit a point where it was very clear that she was unable to provide Shelby a safe and stable home. As of that night, we have kept Shelby in our care. By the end of the year we had filed and won sole custody. I can honestly say that I love her as much as I love less. Of course we argue as any teen and "mother" do but it is the healthy normal type of arguing. Of a child trying to grow up, walking the line between child and adult....of a parent (step or not) trying to keep their child from crossing to far in to adulthood too soon. I have never tried to take her mother's place, I wouldn't dream of it. Her mother will always be her mother. Even when her mother has done things to make Shelby think that she isn't loved, I remind her that her mother will always love her, even if she doesn't always make the best decisions to show that love. All I have only tried to do is to help guide her, protect her and love her as much as I can. She is a great kid, she makes me proud every day (even when she is on my last nerve) and I am so lucky to have her in my life.

Lucky have a husband that lets me sleep in and that will clear my car of rock hard french fries. A (step)daughter who makes me proud of the person she is and the teen she is becoming and a son who gives the best sloppy kisses, who occasionally asks "where's mama" (although he asks "where's dada" a lot more) and who is the cutest baby ever! was a great weekend...